The following is a speech given by one of my freshman boys. I had asked the students in the class to give a 3-minute speech on any topic they wanted. I encouraged them to make it interesting, make it personal, and it MUST be original. In the last class of the day (my favorite class!) we were almost done and I was SO ready to get home! A girl had just finished telling us about a fire in the orphanage in her hometown that had destroyed the building and killed 2 children. It was so sad and as she finished her speech everyone was completely silent and almost all of the girls were crying. The next boy got up and below is his speech, word for word. I copied it (with his permission) from his paper so I would be sure not to miss a thing. The grammatical and spelling errors are purposely unchanged for your amusement. :)
"Hello everyone. I’m Lancelot. Today I will tell you something about myself.
It’s a really bad thing.
It was happened at 1:15am on the 25th of December. My left ear, entered a small cockroach.
It was unfortunate and theatrical. Because in the afternoon we cleaned our dormitory. And we also splashed the demons. It was continued until we went to the bed. At the start, happened nothing. We were wery happy. Because we kills not a few cockroaches.
I guess we killed too many cockroaches. So the cockroaches started revenge.
So I was a tragedy.
When I felt my left ear had an insect, I was fear. Because the cockroach went on the rampage in my left ear. And it was very pain. So I jump out of bed and groan.
My roommates heard my voice so they woke up and helped me. After they learned me, someone said oil or wine. But we didn’t have oil. We had wine, but just beer. And it was not useful. So I realized we can’t solve the thing. But the time was really late. It was about at 1:30am. So my roommates called the ambulance. We rushed outside and waited a moment.
The ambulance sent me to the hospital. The cockroach was killed by the doctor. But because it was so small, the doctor didn’t have the equipment so the doctor couldn’t take it out. So in the morning I went to another hospital. The doctor used instrument and took out the cockroach.
It was a nightmare, a really terrible remember.
Thank you."
"Hello everyone. I’m Lancelot. Today I will tell you something about myself.
It’s a really bad thing.
It was happened at 1:15am on the 25th of December. My left ear, entered a small cockroach.
It was unfortunate and theatrical. Because in the afternoon we cleaned our dormitory. And we also splashed the demons. It was continued until we went to the bed. At the start, happened nothing. We were wery happy. Because we kills not a few cockroaches.
I guess we killed too many cockroaches. So the cockroaches started revenge.
So I was a tragedy.
When I felt my left ear had an insect, I was fear. Because the cockroach went on the rampage in my left ear. And it was very pain. So I jump out of bed and groan.
My roommates heard my voice so they woke up and helped me. After they learned me, someone said oil or wine. But we didn’t have oil. We had wine, but just beer. And it was not useful. So I realized we can’t solve the thing. But the time was really late. It was about at 1:30am. So my roommates called the ambulance. We rushed outside and waited a moment.
The ambulance sent me to the hospital. The cockroach was killed by the doctor. But because it was so small, the doctor didn’t have the equipment so the doctor couldn’t take it out. So in the morning I went to another hospital. The doctor used instrument and took out the cockroach.
It was a nightmare, a really terrible remember.
Thank you."
